


it’s a coast thing, you wouldn’t get it

by kickassfu



Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Crack, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Humor, M/M, Romantic Getaway, both pov's, horny bois being horny without actually doing anything, innuendos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:35:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22947166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kickassfu/pseuds/kickassfu
Summary: “Take off your shirt.” Jaskier said, while getting rid of his own.“Is that a...thing? A Coast thing?” Geralt looked confused and absolutely lovely; Jaskier loved him. Geralt’s knowledge of all things about the Coast were minimal at best and adorably mistaken at worst.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 6
Kudos: 184





	it’s a coast thing, you wouldn’t get it

**Author's Note:**

> I got this prompt on tumblr: Geralt not knowing minute things about the coast, whereas Jaskier does. Which leads to a situation where Jaskier throws on a fancy lotion thats like coconut or something (i know its not geographically correct but stay with me) and Geralt just looses. his. mind. just goes full feral over it 
> 
> which i wasn't really sure what they meant (i'm slow on my best days) and someone else told me they probably meant something like: I think anon is asking for a Geralt that doesn't know what sunscreen is and Absolutely loves the smell of it on Jaskier on an animalistic level?
> 
> so this happened? idk what this is lool but it was fun writing it, hope you enjoy it??

They needed a _break_ ; things were too messy and busy and annoying. Jaskier needed to lie down in the sand and enjoy the sun on his face, absolutely not moving for anything (except maybe for a dip in the warm water). And yes, maybe Witchers didn’t have beach vacations, but _fuck_ that, Geralt deserved a little time off to. What were the people going to do? Disturb the big, bad, white wolf’s vacation? No, Jaskier didn’t think so.

Besides romantic getaways were always lovely; they couldn’t keep flirting in gross swamps and shitty inns. 

“Take off your shirt.” Jaskier said, while getting rid of his own.

“Is that a... _thing_? A Coast thing?” Geralt looked confused and absolutely lovely; Jaskier loved him. Geralt’s knowledge of all things about the Coast were minimal at best and adorably mistaken at worst.

“Yes darling, it’s called sunbathing and it’s fantastic. You need some color, you’ve been looking even more deathly pale. So chop chop.”

He didn’t seem thoroughly convinced, but did what Jaskier told him anyway, “Now what?”

“Do you want to lose the pants too?”

“No.”

“ _Shame._ ” Jaskier laughed fully and loud, enjoying Geralt’s grumpy face, “Now, you sit down or lie down, and relax.”

“On the sand?”

“No, you silly Witcher of a man. Put your cloak down, we brought them for a reason.” they also brought food and drinks, because Jaskier wasn’t a savage!

In a matter of seconds Geralt was lying down, looking up at the sky, and just...breathing. _Maybe the vacation wouldn’t be a complete disaster._ Until the scent of _coconuts(?)_ , invaded his senses, and he turned his head to look at the man he had come to love, his companion, his friend, his bard. Rubbing something on his body.

It was puzzling and weird; a strange and arousing sight, to be honest. It wasn’t the first time he had seen Jaskier rubbing some lotion or other on his face or hands, _‘It’s moisturizing Geralt! Why do you think I always look so pretty?”_ Jaskier had told him once, to which his response was an obvious _‘Because you are beautiful and kind, made by the Gods as a gift to humanity.’_

Jaskier had liked his answer, _a lot_ , giving him plenty of _gifts_ and _favors_ in return. Geralt knew his bard love language was words, and by now he was quite sure which words worked best.

 _That damn smell was going to drive him insane_ , “What the fuck are you doing?”

Jaskier looked at him as if he had grown a second head, “Protecting my beautiful skin from the sun.” the ‘obviously’ left unsaid out loud, but quite clean in his expression.

“What about my beautiful skin?” Geralt said, sounding like a petulant child.

“First you save yourself, then you save others, don’t you know the basics?”

“I’d save you first.”

“Aww, that’s nice. _Dumb_ , but nice.”

Geralt shifted his body; lying on his side and his head on his hand, to be able to look at Jaskier better. It looked sensual, the smell, the way Jaskier’s hands moved methodically and slow, the sun hitting his hair and eyes in just the _right_ way. His hands itched, begging to touch him, and then he noticed Jaskier trying to reach his back with little to no success, and Geralt jumped at the opportunity, “Need a hand?”

“Yes please. Before I murder someone out of frustration!” he grumbled, annoyed, and then smiled, “And then I’ll help you.”

Geralt wanted to say he could reach his back perfectly fine (even though his muscles were big, he was still pretty limber - Jaskier’s words not his), but the thought of having Jaskier’s hands on him was to good for him to pass on, “Thanks.”

His back is lean and strong, and as Geralt spreads the lotion on Jaskier’s body, he wants to leave a trail of kisses from the top of his head to his lower back. The smell of it is making him heady and hungry - definitely _not_ for food, and still, Geralt wanted to bite Jaskier’s tender neck more than anything else. But then he’s done, and it’s his turn to get manhandled by the deft bard.

It feels nice and warm; by the end of it Geralt is almost asleep, and Jaskier looks infinitely amused.

They lie down next to each other, hands entangled, and Jaskier asks, “Happy to be on vacation yet?”

“Hm.” it was going to start being a yearly thing for sure, everyone needs a break once in a while after all, and he was no different. “Also, we’re going to use that lotion thing again when we go back to the room.”

Jaskier stared at him, pleasantly surprised, “Is that a promise or a threat?”

“Both.”

 _Oh yeah_ , the vacation was going to be good for them.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm also kickassfu on tumblr~~


End file.
